Penguinz0 on Florida Man Who Stole Two Police Cars

The sheer audacity of this guy is genuinely off the charts. You'd think stealing one police car is the final boss of bad ideas, but this Florida man decided to go for the New Game+ achievement. He leads the Volusia Sheriff's Office on a 60-mile scenic tour of the highway in a stolen Cocoa PD vehicle, which is already a legendary start. The cops finally manage to run him off the road, crashing his first stolen ride into the woods. Game over, right? You'd assume he'd surrender and reflect on his poor life choices. But no, that's where this story gets its certified moist meter reading. This dude hops out of the wrecked cruiser, sees another police car that has just responded to the scene, and his brain apparently fires off a single neuron that says, "Upgrade." He just casually jacks the *second* cop car and peels out, leaving the officers standing there completely baffled. It's one of the most unbelievable Uno reverse cards ever played in a police chase. You can't even write this stuff. The officers who just caught him have to get on the radio and explain that the suspect they just crashed is now driving away in their colleague's vehicle. As penguinz0 points out, it's a level of chaotic energy that's almost respectable in its stupidity. Of course, this legendary run couldn't last forever. The combined police forces finally got their act together and deployed stop sticks, bringing the second leg of his cop car joyride to an end. But for a glorious moment, this man was living in his own Grand Theft Auto lobby, swapping out damaged vehicles for fresh ones mid-mission. The full moistcr1tikal breakdown covers just how insane this entire sequence of events was, from the initial chase to the absolute galaxy-brain move of stealing a backup police car. It's a masterclass in escalating a terrible situation into an unforgettable one.